Mom-2-Mom is a series of interviews that takes a closer look at motherhood in the modern age. Up next, our mama steps up to the plate with all the hard (and easy) questions on how we’re feeling as mamas-to-be!
You’re about to enter a new phase of life (motherhood). What are you most looking forward to?
LF: I have so many fond memories of cooking, traveling, exploring the creek in the backyard, and Saturday drives with my parents and siblings and I can’t wait to create those memories with my own family. Peter and I are already talking about the things we’ll do together when this new person enters our life (like having a “song of the day” everyday). Creating those experiences together – both large and small – really excites me!
KF: I am excited (and nervous) to get to know and nurture a new, tiny, human being. I am nervous because it’s a completely new phase and I want / hope that the relationship I have with my child will be as strong as the one I have with my parents. They did a good job! I hope I can be half as great a parent.
What do you wonder most about?
LF: If I’ll be as tired as everyone says I will.
KF: I wonder about everything I don’t know! As we’ve been out of NYC due to COVID (and frantically trying to rescue our business), I haven’t been doing the planning I thought I would in the months before my due date (birthing classes, reading maternity books, etc.) So right now I am kind of wondering about everything! But I also wonder what our little boy’s personality will be like? Will he be outgoing, introverted, book smart, funny? Hopefully, he is a combination of the best my husband and I have to offer!
What’s one thing I did with you growing up that you plan to do with your children?
LF: You’ve always been so involved and were so engaged with us growing up, so it’s hard to say just one thing! But I think I want to emulate all the little things: Laying our clothes out together the night before school; sitting at the counter for after-school-snacks; making breakfast together on Saturday mornings, and weekend hikes and bike rides.
KF: Oh my goodness, how could I name one? You were there for us in SO many capacities: as a teacher, friend, mama, chauffeur (driving us to 1 million practices, classes, lessons), confidante, cheerleader and more. I loved our tradition of back to school shopping; I loved how you changed our bed sheets on Sunday nights as a fresh way to start the week; I hope to cook meals 15% as delicious as the ones you cooked for us… and I remember in middle school when I took my academics too seriously (at the ripe old age of 12), you would insist on a “mental health day” every so often where we got to stay home with you and cook and craft. I hope I can do all of that for my son. And I hope you’re going to show us the way!
And something that you definitely will NOT do – like make them eat dry chicken!
LF: Haha. There’s very little that we did that I don’t remember fondly. I guess, swim team!
KF: Haha! We do joke about that night where I sat at the kitchen table for an eternity because I wouldn’t finish the (overly dry) chicken you cooked. You always balanced discipline with kindness and even though there were very occasional tantrums growing up (dry chicken dinners, unreasonable curfews) I think we had a pretty perfect childhood.
What do you think the most profound change will be once children are a part of your lives?
LF: I think I will have to be deliberate about carving out husband time, work time, phone time. When you were raising us, it seemed like there were fewer distractions and I want to make sure technology doesn’t interfere with my being present. I know this will be a challenge, especially being a small business owner, but will be something I have to be diligent about because I don’t want to miss wonderful moments with my family.
KF: I am going to have to learn to work less! And to cook better!
Using 3 – 4 adjectives, describe how you think each of your husbands will be as fathers.
LF: Adventuresome (always with an activity); Softie; Doting.
KF: Compassionate; Humorous; Loving; Empathetic.
You are so close, and have been all of your lives – how do you plan to raise your kids and their interaction with one another, especially since they will be born days apart.
LF: There is little I value more than my relationships with my siblings and I really hope we can raise our kids as close as siblings. We plan for them to spend a lot of time together (especially if we do a nanny share while they’re little), and I hope they grow up together sharing summer memories at the beach, and experiencing travel and adventures together. Given how much time Kathryn and I spend with each other, it hopefully won’t be a problem!
KF: I can’t imagine not having a twin – a built-in best friend and companion. I hope our kids will be incredibly close – their DNA is closer to half-siblings than cousins! We are already planning on sharing a nanny so that they will spend their early formative days together. And I am shopping for trundle beds so Lizzie’s girl can do sleepovers alongside my boy!
Do you think you will have similar mothering styles?
LF: I used to think Kathryn would be a more protective, worried parent but recently I’ve begun to think that might be me! Hopefully, we can both be chill, calm, and collected like you were. You were the perfect balance of being our friend and making us respect you.
KF: This is a good question! Everyone has always joked that I will be an uptight mom, but I hope we can learn from each other and keep each other calm and measured – and FUN. I think I will be a little strict when it comes to screen time and learning and academics (all things I deeply value) and we’ll have to take our little boy to Lizzie’s house for fun craft days but overall I think we’ll be similar!
How involved do you expect your husbands to be in child-rearing?
LF: Very!
KF: Very I think / hope! Nick plays a huge role in our home already – he cooks and cleans better than I do. He’s just as excited as I am to be a parent so although we are both going to have a “wake up call” with regard to our own schedules (he’s a creature of habit who loves going to the gym, having his own time), I think we will both be very involved.
What’s the first cocktail you are going to have after your babies are born?
LF: An aperol spritz. Then a margarita.
KF: OMG a tequila Negroni. Or maybe an Aperol spritz and then a tequila Negroni. Can’t wait!